Kate: Where the hell have you been? Tell me more crazy food things.
Maggie: I’m busy! But I’m back! Time for more food talk.
I have a lot of weird food rules. They mostly revolve around figuring out ways to avoid things that might make me fat. There: I said it. I’m scared of getting fat.
Some rules that I currently try to abide by:
- No bread from the breadbasket at dinner.
- No fried foods.
- Sauce on the side (almost always).
- Don’t eat much during the day because you always eat too much at night.
- Always ALWAYS volume eat. Choose veggies over anything else because God forbid you get the slightest feeling of hunger.
- Always order / eat fewer calories than anyone else at the table.
Rules that I used to have that I don’t anymore because they make life boring (these were short-lived):
- No sauce on anything.
- (whatever food) steamed, if possible.
- Very few carbs.Don’t eat Bobby’s food.
I am a weird eating disordered/disordered eating person. I actually appeared pretty normal about food up until I started trying to “get better”. When I was 102 pounds I ate anything I wanted, I just didn’t eat that much of it. A typical day might have looked like this:
- Breakfast: big muffin from the bakery downstairs (they were half off after 6 and I always got them if they were still there).
- Lunch: some kind of salad with chicken and veggies and honey mustard dressing (on the side) (no bread).
- Snack: a cookie or a piece of fruit.
- Dinner: a toasted bagel with butter or some other breakfast food (pancakes or waffles were favorites).
- Dessert: froyo or another piece of fruit.
I was tired of feeling hungry sometimes so I switched to this new “better” plan when I started to get “healthier”:
- Something not veggies…
This plan sucks. It sucks so much. And now I can’t figure out how to go back to my first plan without bingeing. I say I’m getting better at it but I’m actually lying. I’m probably worse.
Well, maybe not. Bobby and I have been fighting for the last week or so (I’ll admit it; everyone fights) and it’s because of my weird neuroses. I have decided that my weird neuroses are not worth the best thing that’s ever happened to me (Bobby). So I’m letting him have a say in what I eat; I’m letting him tell me when I’m being weird; I’m letting him help me. I’ve said that before but it never worked. It’s been working now for a few days. One thing that helps me be normal is to *not* blog all the time.
This situation reminds me of (awesome) Coldplay lyrics:
And the hardest part
Was letting go not taking part
Only obviously not about a human relationship. It’s funny how relationships can seem so different (relationship with a person versus a relationship with food) but when you get down to it they are the same.
Kate is making me do that Un-Roast thing where I say what I’m loving about myself today. Today I love my feet. They are big and strong and they help me walk all over this beautiful city. And I just got a pedicure. And it’s okay for feet to be big. I can’t help that.
Kate also told me some of her food rules today over gchat and I can’t wait for her to share. You’ll like ‘em.
What are your food rules?