I cut off all my hair

last night, I had a dream about looking in a mirror and thinking, “You would look amazing if you cut your hair off.”

And then this morning, when Bear forgot his insulin and I brought it to his office and I had a hat over my greasy hair because I’d just woken up, he said playfully, “You should cut off your hair. You’d look so cute.”

And then I was back home, later this morning, working on yet another article, and suddenly I got up and went into the bathroom and stared at myself in the mirror for a full minute, or maybe slightly longer, and I thought, “It’s so annoying how it gets knotted every time I wear my coat.” Which is all the time, because it’s winter.

I went into the other room and got the scissors with the blue handles. I came back into the bathroom and before I could think anything that meant anything, I cut off a huge chunk of my hair. In the front.

I kept cutting.

I felt great. I was grinning at myself. The more I cut, the better I looked. The better I felt.

After a while, I took a break and washed it and dried it. The drying part took like a minute. My mom called. We talked about how our weeks were going. I mentioned that I was cutting my hair.

“Oh no,” she said. “Professionally, I hope?”

“No, right now. While we’re talking.”

“Are you joking?”

“Nope. I’m definitely cutting it right now.”

There was a bushy patch that the headset was obscuring.

“You know you have a job,” she said, and then, “Or several.”

“Your scare tactics aren’t working.”

She burst out laughing. “Fine.”

I’ve thought about cutting my hair for a while. I wrote about really short hair and shaved heads here.  But then I thought, “There’s the wedding. I can’t have really short hair in the pictures.” And then I thought, “It’s the winter, I’ll be cold.” And all along I thought, “I should really lose a little weight before I do it, because short hair looks better on skinny people.”

Which is why I’m glad that I just did it. As soon as I finished, I ate a bunch of Fig Newmans (those things are really not at all healthy, even though they have “organic” written all over the packaging), and I wondered why I hadn’t done this sooner.

When I watched a documentary about New York City preschools, all of the teachers and administrators over forty had short hair. All of the young, stylish moms had long hair. When I went out to meet Bear (who was very impressed) and a friend for dinner, I noticed that I was the only young woman in sight with really short hair.

Ha! Whatever! I cut off my hair!

*  *  *

Un-roast: Today I love the way I look with my stick-up boy hair. Come on, you saw that coming.

P.S. I wrote this piece last night. That’s why the timing sounds off. But I left it that way, because it sounded better.


Kate on January 14th 2011 in beauty, being different, body, new york

94 Responses to “I cut off all my hair”

  1. Me responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 12:06 pm #

    OMG!!! You look GORGEOUS!!!

    I’ve been reading for a bit – Bear’s dad is a former professor/buddy of mine and particularly like your hair pieces (no pun intended, but now that I see it, I’ll leave it). Before I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I thought to myself, “this is really just a flat mop of over proccessed string. I should just lip it off and start over,” and then, well, chemo and all … I wore a wig once. A hat when the weather required it.

    I also have a facebook album called “hairstory.”. If you’re mildly interested, I’ll privately tell you how to friend me.

    Seriously though, I love your blog and you look fantastic!

  2. Gaby responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 12:16 pm #

    Beautiful!! I love it! You look so spunky and cute and it really fits your personality. This is why I admire you so much! I’m way too afraid to just do things, and I spend way too much time thinking things over and over and over. I’ve found I (and most women) hide behind long “feminine” hair. When I was younger I was so shy I literally did this. Did you see The Incredibles? Look up a pic of Violet in the movie…that was me.

  3. zoe (and the beatles) responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 12:23 pm #

    you look amazing kate!!! phhfft, i don’t know why you didn’t do it earlier, either! go for you, kate! i’m too scared to part with my hair completely…(even though all the curls get knotted like nobody’s business ALL.THE.TIME). maybe i can take a cue from your badass self and get all inspired ;) have a great friday!

  4. leslie responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 12:30 pm #

    i LOVE your haircut. you did a fabulous job on yourself.

    i cut all my hair off (well, a professional did) a few months after i graduated college. it was the best beauty decision i ever made. my hair has always been “my thing,” and i think wearing it short says so much about my personal style and self-confidence. i was in a wedding this summer, and all the other bridesmaids wore these elaborate updos with their long, straight hair. and then there was me, with my short curls, and i styled it myself. i loved that.

  5. Christin@purplebirdblog responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 12:36 pm #

    You are ROCKING that hair. So stinkin’ gorgeous! And you have the same sass in your eye as I did when I wore a new scarf the other day (consequently while admiring I’m liking how long my hair is getting again, lol!!). :)

  6. Liz responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 12:36 pm #

    When I was in high school, Senade O’connor shaved her head http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iUiTQvT0W_0
    while I was writing a list of “10 things to do before I get married.”
    I added it to the list. Then there was college, job interviews, grad school interviews- it was never a good time to shave my head.
    15 years later, I had completed the “to do list” with the exception of the said shave. I just met the man of my dreams and was self employed. On the fall equinox, I thought, “if this guy is really right for me, I’d better complete that list before we get married.”
    I did. I loved it. He still loved me and we have been married 9 months. It sure was cold, even in California, that winter- I still have all the hats I bought that winter!
    Thanks for this post. You got girl- you look great with the short hair!!

  7. We-joe responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 12:39 pm #

    I think you look great! It definitely shows your personality and bravery.
    I’ve been wanting a shaved head and then super short hair since high school (15 years), but I am too attached my to hair in a vain way. I like it because it’s pretty and romantic. But I think the day is coming for me too to chop it all off impulsively in the bathroom.
    Yay for you!

  8. Mme Wong responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 12:46 pm #

    Cheers for your gutsy move! I love it, it looks very sexy on you.

    I’m always surprised to see how many people consider hair to be some kind of untouchable permanent fixture, or that they seem to pour so much of their identity into it. And it’s very interesting how much you can find out about yourself if you just take that extra step and dramatically change your hair.

    I remember shaving my head in my senior year in college. It was fascinating to see the wide range of reactions I got, going from amusingly pleased to completely horrified (there certainly were more “horrified” ones than I would have thought). I just loved the fact that I was able to see myself in a new light. And I’ve gone back to having extremely short hair several times over the years.

    Super short hair is really awesome. I think it makes you look bold and completely unashamed of who you are.

  9. Erin responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 12:54 pm #

    Wow! You look fabulous.

    I adore my short hair and can’t imagine having it long ever again. Right now it has been the shortest ever because I trust my friend hairstylist to cut it that way. I had gone to another hairstylist before and wanted it short but she didn’t cut it as short as I indicated because she said since I have curly hair it wouldn’t look as good. Boy was she wrong! (I have the luxury of wearing it curly when I want but straightening it as well). Right now my “bangs” are the longest part of my hair but I have been looking at pictures of shorter hairstyles (similar to yours) and wondering how I would look.

    Kudos to you!!

  10. Samantha Angela @ Bikini Birthday responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 12:56 pm #

    You look fantastic!

  11. Ashley responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 12:58 pm #

    You can rock the short hair!

  12. Jess responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 1:04 pm #

    Kate!! It’s awesome! I’m so impressed that you did it yourself and it looks GOOD. :D

  13. Leslie B responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 1:27 pm #

    You look fabulous! You look like Trouble. You look impish and seriously happy. You look ready to climb K2. In hoop earrings. You look like the author photo for your dust jacket, hardcover edition, sold a million copies in first printing.

    Say, seems like the right time for a studio portrait of you & husband. Maybe. If you feel like it.

  14. allison marie responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 1:27 pm #

    adorable! I did the same thing about a year ago (although I had a friend cut it for me) and one of my best friends reminded me that “a women who cuts her hair is about to change her life.” – coco before chanel

    i’m proud of your bravery :)

  15. Kate responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 1:49 pm #

    @Leslie B
    Ha! I love that you think I look like Trouble. What an awesome compliment!

    Also, it’d be pretty great if I got a book deal.

  16. Rabbit responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 2:00 pm #


  17. Holly responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 2:00 pm #

    wonderful. self-haircuts are so much fun. that is the same reason why I have resolved to have really short hair sometime–because I shouldn’t have to lose weight to do what I want!

  18. Valerie responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 2:09 pm #

    Awesome! It’s so funny how much status hair can hold when it comes to looks when it doesn’t really matter.

    I’ve always been the type to chop of my hair (in the high school girls bathroom, a mini-makeover between classes that consisted of lopping off my entire ponytail in one snip) or let other people have the freedom to do what they want with my hair (friends with scissors, friends in school with soon to be licensed scissors). I’ve always been the type to drastically dye my hair whenever I felt like it.

    Honestly, there’s nothing more exciting than looking in the mirror after a quick, extreme makeover. You’re always left thinking, “Who is that foxy bitch?” And then you realize…it’s you!

  19. Kate responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 2:14 pm #

    Nice! Clearly, I’m in good company!

  20. Sona responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 2:22 pm #

    You look amazing! Enjoy the new hair!

  21. Heather M. responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 3:22 pm #

    Short hair is awesome! I’ve had really short hair since I was 15 (I’m 22 now) and can’t imagine wanting to grow it out again. If it gets more than a couple of inches long, I get antsy!

    I cut mine myself, too. I wonder if that’s an unschooler thing?

    Either way, your cut looks great! I’m in awe of your multitasking skills that you managed it while talking on the phone. I’d probably have cut my ear off. Enjoy, and remember: in wintertime, scarves are a short haired girl’s best friend!

  22. Christy responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 3:25 pm #


  23. Zoe responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 4:12 pm #

    Okay, I know that this isn’t what it was all about, but – you look SO cute with your hair short like that! I love giving compliments to women who are due them, and so I really wanted to tell you that.

    I’ve shaved my head (as in 1/8″ guard on a razor, just like a boy) twice before. And I loved it, for almost exactly the same reasons that you love it now. It was SO EASY. And cute. It helped my scalp condition. It was sort of daring and no one I knew had short hair and that was kind of cool. And I refused to wear makeup most of the time, even though another of those female hair rules is that if you must insist on having boyishly short hair, you must have vamp makeup on at all times to emphasise your femininity. I did not. I was a biracial college girl who wore my hair short with a plain face and a muscle shirt next to my (extremely hot and mainstream looking) redheaded boyfriend, out in public, and it confused people, and I didn’t care.

    It was *awesome*. I miss it. Except… now I kind of like how I look with hair enough to try to grow it out. And my hot redhead husband prefers it long (he didn’t like it short. I didn’t care about that either) and it pleases me to please him.

    Hair, man. So many decisions and so much identity wrapped up in it, long or short. Go you for taking the leap and trying something drastic!

  24. Kate responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 4:31 pm #

    Wow. Can I just say that you are awesome?

  25. monika hardy responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 6:38 pm #

    you are so brave.

    and yes please do write a book.
    the masses of people glued to public ed need you to unleash them with your brilliant insight of what authenticity looks like, what it feels like.

  26. San D responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 7:51 pm #

    Cool beans, Kate!

  27. Cat Carter responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 8:35 pm #

    read your article about unschooling with Aol.com. saw your pic and the links to the blogs. i think you look lovely either way, but being a short-haired gal who has spent time with long locks too, isn’t it liberating? can spend time just living instead of having to pull it all free every time I put on a jacket or purse strap etc etc etc.

    way to go! i’d cut my dd’s hair shorter if her dad wouldn’t freak..maybe when she’s older she’ll opt for short herself.

    we are homeschooling too mostly cus i just love having her around. ;)

  28. Noelle responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 9:04 pm #

    Bravo on the hair cut!! You’re rockin it.

  29. Holly responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 9:17 pm #

    Love your post — reminded me of the movie “Wild Hearts Can’t be Broken”….

  30. Maryann responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 9:24 pm #

    WOW! I’m going to cut my hair tonight!

  31. Beverly Hayes responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 9:26 pm #

    The cut is adorable. So cute. Short hair has always been the ultimate fashion “do” (no pun intended) for those who have the chutzpah to try it out.

    After reading all the comments, I feel sorry for these women who feel their feminine appeal is so tied up with having longer hair. We should wear our hair for ourselves, not because it is “customary” for woman to sport longer hair or because men prefer it and historically find it alluring or desirable or feminine. Men prefer a lot of things that are not in women’s best interest (remember love, honor and OBEY, anyone?). Long hair is a lot of work. Short hair can be spunky and chic and so SEXY!

    Those who dream of short hair should live the dream. It will grow back if you find you’re not up to the challenge of defining yourself by something more than your looks.

  32. erica responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 9:33 pm #

    So, I have past-the-shoulder hair. It’s cold. I have a wedding I’m a bridesmaid for in September and I’d like to lose some weight because skinny people look better with short hair. AND, I’m growing it out, along with a friend, to donate it to Locks for Love. *sigh*
    You look absolutely adorable. I will have my pixie cut in the Spring. Screw everyone else. Thanks for this.

  33. kiki responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 9:57 pm #

    I think your haircut looks awesome! You look a fresh new you like youre ready to take on the world! I have locks and as much as I love them have really been thinking about cutting them off and going back to short hair its soo much easier but I always think I should be thinner when I do it. Well I just had a hysterectomy and aside from the pain of healing feel fantastic and am ready to go and just attack life hit it head on and leave my mark! The qoute by coco chanel has really set it for me. People are always telling me theyll be pissed off if I cut my locks but you know Im done doing for everyone else. Thankyou for this!

  34. InMyHonest responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 10:07 pm #

    You’re a gorgeous girl … I enjoy reading your blogs But I can not say that the short hair cut works. It makes you look older.

    I loved the way your hair was before. I think it lended a carefree youthful look. Consider longer hair. It works better for you. I think a lot of people are being nice.

    Short hair doesn’t work for everyone. I think short hair is a huge trend right now – everyone is doing it, but it doesn’t work on every face.

  35. MarieElizabeth responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 10:11 pm #

    Not that you are looking for approval, but BRAVO! You look stunning and good for you for just going for it!

  36. Tabs responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 11:00 pm #

    YES. JOIN US! YOU LOOK AWESOME! That’s how I do it too. I just go for it! I love it!

  37. Tabs responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 11:03 pm #

    @Zoe: You are awesome. I’m doing that same thing now. I have both sides of my head shaved, no make-up, and tons of piercings. Plus I work hard to NOT dress femininely, because I hate being sexualized. But I was trying to explain to the boy recently how, when girls have short hair, they have to “make up for it.” And man, that’s BS. Confusing people can be it’s own reward! (;

  38. LJW responded on 14 Jan 2011 at 11:58 pm #

    I agree with “InMyHonest”. As I read some of the responses, it began to feel like it was just one blind accolade after another, each spurring more momentum for the next. I wondered if people even looked at your previous long hair picture or not. It definitely framed your face more tenderly than the short style. I had long hair to the small of my back until 15, then it went to shoulder length, then chin, and now just down the back of my neck. So, I totally understand the desire for transformation. But, you have to be realistic about beauty, too. Just because it’s easier, doesn’t mean it looks better. If you’re okay with that, then good. Own it and enjoy it. I believe in doing the best with what you have, in all avenues of life. Making things work for you functionally and aesthetically. Just make sure you’re in reality. We can’t always have our cake and eat it too.

  39. Leah Felicity responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 12:04 am #

    Your hair is splendid. You’re beautiful!

    Be aware, however, that people will treat you differently. I had short hair for years, and I noticed that women in stores (employees) wouldn’t wait on me the way they used to (I think due to homophobia). It was only years later, when my hair got grown out to about chin length, before women started treating me differently. Keep an eye on people’s reactions: I promise, it’ll give you something to blog about.

    But, I feel like I have to reiterate: I really like it.

  40. Claire Allison responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 12:45 am #

    Wow, you could write a whole post on some of these comments. I think it makes you look distinguished- and you know at our age (we’re the same age) I think that’s good. The cusp of 25 is when you want to start experimenting with looking older and distinguished. You look completely at ease and a little retro (although that could also be the turtleneck and the hoop earrings) and a lot like the lovechild of Margaret Atwood and Leonard Cohen. I don’t know why I just decided you are the love child of those two… I guess you look Canadian?

  41. Sandra Tapia responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 1:21 am #

    You are awesome! I love your free spirit! Your parents did the best job in unschooling you. I so want to do this with my boys. My husband is not on the same page with me. You know I cut my own hair too. People like it so much, they ask me to take over for their hair dressers. Keep writing girl, you’ve charmed me. :0)

  42. Wei-Wei responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 3:34 am #

    I’m not going to lie – sometimes I want the ease of short hair as well. I’m not brave enough to cut my own hair or declare myself liberated; I’m not brave enough to rock any unique look, actually. I think that your long hair looked great and made you look prettier and younger, but I’m a materialistic person and when I look at you with short hair, I see someone much more mature but dare I say… carefree?

    Anyway: it was so brave of you and I’m incredibly proud of you and KEEP ROCKING :D

  43. Amy responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 7:23 am #

    Definitely a good look for you. It’s awesome you were able to do it yourself!

  44. Dana Udall-Weiner responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 7:36 am #

    Uh, it looks like this was the hair you were born to have! Adorable! I have decided to chop mine (I think) as well. I actually thought my appointment was today, and spent much of yesterday looking online for pictures of cute short hair cuts. And then I realized it’s not until next week. Sigh. Anyway, you are brave and beautiful. (And you might have a calling as a hairstylist, too. Do you need yet another job?)

  45. Lola responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 10:32 am #

    I like the short hair, but go get it professionally fixed. I highly recommend Kristi at High Horse in Williamsburg, but you strike me as the kind of girl who “doesn’t go to Brooklyn”. Fringe is also en pointe and so is Seagull. Deva downtown specializes in curly hair. Of course, I expect the followup post: “Women seem to have fancy haircuts and go to places called Salons. I followed a woman for 89 blocks bc her haircut was all different lengths. I guess those were the layers all the fancy Manhattan women talk about. Do you know I got married to Bear? Anyway, I don’t know about salons bc I was homeschooled. Have you heard about these devices called brushes”

  46. Kate responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 4:05 pm #

    This may be the funniest antagonistic comment I’ve ever gotten. You actually cracked me up!

    It’s true– I am married to Bear.

    But “doesn’t go to Brooklyn”? I’m not sure what you’re going for there. “Snobby”? I mostly feel like people might assume I ONLY go to Brooklyn, which seems to work with the whole cutting my own hair thing…

    And then the thing about not knowing anything about the world because I was homeschooled. Sigh….

  47. Monique responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 4:15 pm #

    I LOVE IT!! I’ve been thinking about taking the same plunge, but as yet, you’re braver than I. It looks amazing, truly. Excellent decision.

  48. Monique responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 4:20 pm #

    Whoa! Just read some of the other comments and they cracked me up!

    And for the record, I was NOT just being nice. (Why bother to comment if you’re just going to make stuff up?)

    Un-roast: today I love that I usually follow the mantra, “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothing at all.”

    And I love my new coconut shampoo.

    For some reason all these comments are making me feel especially silly and simultaneously confident (you just exude confidence in everything you do, I think it’s catching).

  49. Just Josie responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 5:10 pm #

    Kate, you are too cool! :D I love it and think it looks fabulous. I also think it looks very distinguished, and why is that a bad thing (just lol’ing at the commenters who said it makes you look older — why does that have to be a bad thing necessarily?!). I wish I had the courage to do this, but my mom would totally kill me. A couple of summers ago, she specifically told me NOT to cut my bangs, but I did. My bangs are grown out, anyway, so you couldn’t really tell since it was only like 4 inches off and the bangs were as long as the rest of my hair (which was at my waist at the time). Anyway, about two weeks after the fact, she finally noticed that one strip looked shorter than the rest, and she absolutely freaked out on me, like screaming, yelling, cursing, etc… Personally, I don’t see what the big deal is? I wasn’t even “rebelling”, really, and if I were, that’d be, like, the most minor rebellion in the history of adolescence! Haha, sorry, that story just cracks me up and I thought this was an appropriate place to share it.

    By the way, I am totally NOT “just being nice”! Lol. ;)

  50. kiki responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 5:58 pm #

    You know I left a post last night after reading your blog AND after looking at your hair and I still say AWESOME! And I am still considering cutting mine though a lot of my friends are saying no! lol So Im giving myself a month to think it through. But ignore the haters its your hair be free with it!

  51. Just Josie responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 6:01 pm #

    Sorry, just had to add that I think the following highly ironic when one considering the title of your entire blog: “We can’t always have our cake and eat it too.” Ahahahaha! xD

    Also, don’t feel bad, I’ve gone to public school my whole life, and I only JUST learned about these crazy “brush” things (?!) like, LAST YEAR. What an invention!

    (I love sardonicism.)

  52. Just Josie responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 6:02 pm #

    consider should be with an ‘s’, not an ‘ing’. That is all.

  53. Linda responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 8:01 pm #

    I have always wanted hair just like that. I don’t think it would work for me, because mine doesn’t have enough curl. But I would cut it all off in a second if I thought I would look even half as cute. You did a fantastic job, amazing! A professional stylist couldn’t have done better.

  54. Jill responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 9:00 pm #

    My 10 yr. old unschooled daughter says, “Wow! Her hair looks so awesome!” She also approved of your long hair too. We also enjoyed your recent article, “I Was Homeschooled.”

  55. Anne responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 9:35 pm #

    My 16 year old unschooled son shaved his hair off on Christmas Eve. We said goodnight to him with a full head of hair, and on Christmas morning he came downstairs bald! He looked so pleased and proud, & once I was over the initial shock I couldn’t help but be happy for him. His hair was beautiful! But he was so ready for a change, he had been wanting to do it for two years, but his cousin/hair stylist always said, “lets do it this way now, and if you still want to next time we’ll do it then”……He knew it wasn’t going to happen, so he just did it. A friend that shaves his head asked him, “Okay, what was the first thought you had when you were done?”, and he said, “I’m cold!” Our friend said that the first thought he had the first time he shaved his head was, “Oh God, what have I done!”, but my son has not had a moment of regret. I could have used a little warning…and a few more pictures of the way it was, but really, I am just very happy for him. I think doing something like that is very empowering, and that’s always a good thing. You look beautiful! We also loved your article, “I was homeschooled”.

  56. OMSH responded on 15 Jan 2011 at 9:36 pm #

    A while back, when I first started going grey, I thought…I gotta color this mop, I’m too young to be grey.

    But about 8 years ago, when I turned 30, I said “Screw it” and grey out the grey. I kept it short (really short) for years and recently grew it out for the very reason you cut yours off.

    Why not?
    Everyone said I’d look old and not-so-fashionable, but I wanted to give it a go. And I love it.

    And you look great.

  57. Elly responded on 16 Jan 2011 at 10:15 am #

    How gorgeous! (not that you weren’t gorgeous with long hair, too…) Must admit that when you started talking about cutting your hair I thought you meant more around shoulder-length…probably because that’s the way I occasionally envision cutting my own hair. And then I saw the pictures! Awesome that you were brave enough to do it.

  58. AW responded on 16 Jan 2011 at 12:15 pm #

    Love the short ‘do. It is very cute. I’ve cut my own hair many times, too.

  59. Roxanne responded on 16 Jan 2011 at 11:52 pm #

    You look so hot! :D Beautiful, Kate. ^^

  60. Virginia responded on 17 Jan 2011 at 12:42 am #

    You look so great! I also went through a super short hairstyle phase and have been tempted to revisit that cut lately. Congratulations on having enough guts to go for it!

  61. stacie responded on 17 Jan 2011 at 10:21 am #

    Awesome! You are SO brave. You look fantastic. I don’t know if I would have the nerve to do the same thing. I haven’t gotten a “professional” haircut in about 3 years. My hubby has trimmed it once.

    My hair is to my rear end now and I think a haircut would almost be like mourning the death of someone (or something) I loved. I am also of the “short hair looks better on slim people” camp so I wouldn’t be able to pull it off.

    I dunno, I cut my hair once many, many years ago while I was a working mom and LOTS of the ladies from our company told me “thank you” for cutting my hair because it gave them the courage to do the same. Many of them did cut their hair.

    I think as women we become so attached to our security blanket of hair. Do whatever feels right to you. The length of your hair doesn’t make you more or less feminine. For right now I am keeping my long locks.

  62. Cindy responded on 17 Jan 2011 at 11:09 am #

    sooooooooooooooooooooo cute!

    I hack my own hair ! I love doing that!

    good for you chica!!!!!

  63. Patti in Memphis TN responded on 17 Jan 2011 at 1:20 pm #

    Girl….WOW This is my first visit to your blog and I can’t believe how great you look with that short, sexy hair. I have never had long hair because I have “bad” hair. I always felt like the odd ball because it just didn’t look good long. I decided several years ago to go really short and have loved every minute of it. I have people come up to me all the time and tell me how much they LOVE my short hair. It allows you to never have to worry about what you are going to do with your hair because it will only do one thing….be very short. I love it!!

  64. Mandy responded on 17 Jan 2011 at 3:22 pm #

    You know what? I think you look feisty!

  65. Tempest responded on 17 Jan 2011 at 3:29 pm #

    I cut my hair really short last month (ok, specifically LuLu cut my hair off…) and I love it. I’ve swung between bobs and long hair most of life – I dare say this is the shortest it’s been since kindergarten, though I had been afraid to do it b/c I do have very large eyes and a nose to match, but it worked out :)

    It does feel more “adult” at times, but it also seems pretty hip and crazy at others. It’s all what you bring to it.

    I could see your bangs being a little longer in the front (and it looks like your hair is a lot like mine, so it’ll probably be there in 2-3 weeks) for the most perfect framing, love the length on the back and sides.

  66. Dawn responded on 17 Jan 2011 at 7:02 pm #

    That is awesome! The ornery twinkle in your eye–was that always there–or did the cool haircut give you another dimension of attitude?

    In any case, you pull it off beautifully. And think of all the time and money you saved by NOT paying for beauty or barber school.

  67. nestforawren responded on 17 Jan 2011 at 8:20 pm #

    First…love your short haircut! Second..I am a homeschooling mom of 40 plus a few. I read your article about unschooling and loved it. Thank you! Third…if my son is as self-aware and comfortable in his skin as you are (forever) I will feel I have done my job and fulfilled my soul mission in the mother part of my life. Give your mom a hug from me. She was brave too. Fourth…you have 66 comments on this post! If I ever get 5 on my whole blog I’ll faint from the sheer joy of it. Keep feeling good in your skin my dear, you are light years ahead of me.

  68. Jen responded on 18 Jan 2011 at 10:46 am #

    The best part? You have quite a nose and still wear short hair beautifully. I’m a tall woman w/a long forehead and a big nose. It is gratifying–and a relief–so see there are women who are beautiful even WITH short hair and WITHOUT tiny Barbie-snub noses.

  69. Jen responded on 18 Jan 2011 at 10:47 am #

    The best part? You have quite a nose and still wear short hair beautifully. I’m a tall woman w/a long forehead and a big nose. It is gratifying–and a relief–to see there are women who are beautiful even WITH short hair and WITHOUT tiny Barbie-snub noses.

  70. Jen responded on 18 Jan 2011 at 10:59 am #

    Sorry to have gone on about your nose when I just read further down the blog and found “nose” was The Topic just a couple weeks ago.

    As a woman with a big nose, I look for people like you to keep from feeling like the exception. (Mine is long with a bump on the bridge; I’m not even Jewish). I have a photo of a gorgeous Italian woman with a similar nose just to look at when I’m feeling homely. My husband loves my nose and says his Italian grandfather would consider mine “a bit inadequate” in size. So still–love that you refrained from the 3rd surgery and love that you can wear that hair. ~Jen

  71. Kate responded on 18 Jan 2011 at 12:05 pm #

    Thanks for this. I can’t believe I forgot to mention that having a big nose was one of the reasons I hesitated for so long before cutting my hair.

  72. erika responded on 18 Jan 2011 at 12:14 pm #

    Wandered over to your blog today from another site. I am really enjoying it all! And I dig the hair. You did such a great job! Funny thing is I’ve wanted long hair forever, and it’s finally grown, and these past few days I’ve been dreaming about short hair too!

  73. Erin responded on 18 Jan 2011 at 3:01 pm #

    Okay. I have been inspired by your hair (and Ginnifer Godwin’s hair in the Jan/Feb issue of Health) and am going to go shorter than I am currently (my bangs are the longest part (as previously stated) slightly past eyes). So this is how short my hair will be (http://www.celebritymagascene.com/2010/12/-big-love-actress-ginnifer.html) I’m a little apprehensive cause it’s never been this short but I am committed :D

  74. Rebecca responded on 18 Jan 2011 at 5:40 pm #


    This looks FANTASTIC on you!
    (as did the long hair, by the by)

    Don’t you love just running your fingers through it now?
    And the feeling of no hair on the back of your neck?

    You look seriously sexy, chica.

  75. lauren responded on 19 Jan 2011 at 1:22 am #

    so fun!

  76. Nubby Tongue responded on 19 Jan 2011 at 3:20 am #

    I’ve been wishy-washing about chopping all my hair off for a few months, too. Since I’m looking for a gentle shove one way or the other, I’ll take this as a sign. =]
    Looks great!

  77. Kate responded on 19 Jan 2011 at 12:53 pm #

    @Erin and Nubby
    That’s awesome!! I’m flattered that I inspired you. And you should totally go for it.

  78. Kate responded on 19 Jan 2011 at 12:55 pm #

    Yes. I LOVE running my fingers through it. And waking up without any knots or hair falling all over my face. So freeing!

  79. Tara responded on 19 Jan 2011 at 1:33 pm #

    I think your short hair looks fantastic!

  80. Morgan responded on 19 Jan 2011 at 2:53 pm #

    Your hair is fantastic!
    I just wanted to say that your blog inspired me to run a spread on redefining today’s standard of beauty (which is usually almost unattainable thinness) in our high school newspaper. (Since National Eating Disorders Awareness Week is a week after our distribution date, we figured it would be exceptionally timely.) With this spread we’re aiming to reaffirm positive body image and foster a pride in one’s natural, God-given beauty. Thank you so much for reinforcing that mindset with your un-roasts and pride in who you are. You give me hope for the future of female standards.
    Keep posting, I’m loving what you write!

  81. MWN responded on 19 Jan 2011 at 3:48 pm #

    Wow, Kate, it really looks great!!! So cute! You look very different in short hair, as if you have a whole different personality. It does make you look very self-assured and spunky.
    I’ve thought about cutting it that short as well, and I have kind of decided that I don’t have the right face shape for it…I cut it to about my ears a few years ago, and there were some stages that I loved it (and how LIGHT it is! Seriously, when I saw the movie Tangled, I was HORRIFIED by how much her hair must WEIGH and how it LITERALLY and metaphorically weighs her down and holds her back…and then a guy cuts it off without her permission…that’s a whole other discussion we could have) but most of the time I looked really butch, and I prefer to look feminine. So I wasn’t too happy with it. I wish there was some way I could TRY OUT the hairdo before committing to it, like with photoshop or something.

  82. Suzanne responded on 19 Jan 2011 at 6:05 pm #

    AH-MAZ-ING!!! MAH-JORLY good look for YOU!!!!!

  83. Joy responded on 21 Jan 2011 at 7:09 pm #

    I think longer hair is actually easier to take care of, but it’s all a personal choice.

    To the poster who’s growing her hair for Locks of Love: you might want to research them a bit more. They sell most of the hair they collect and give very few wigs to young cancer patients.

  84. Melissa Middleswart responded on 23 Jan 2011 at 10:57 am #

    I just found your blog thru someone else who posted a link to the “nerd girls rule” post, which I enjoyed.

    I’ve not seen a photo of your longer hair, but when I saw these photos, I thought you looked great, amazingly so since you cut it yourself! That part, I can’t imagine doing. I’m pushing 60, have had longish hair only a few times in my life, I must prefer short hair.

    I was quite surprised to see some negative comments in these comments, as I think you look just great. Enjoy your hair freedom!

    I’m going to send a link to my niece.

  85. Lulubelle responded on 23 Jan 2011 at 1:34 pm #

    I’m so jealous! I’m 47 with naturally curly very fine hair, which I always wore very short until about 3 years ago, when I finally toughened up and decided to let it grow. It’s taken me forever to grow it out evenly, and it curls up to just below chin-length even though it’s actually about 4 inches longer. Your hair is so cute short like this, I may have to hide all my scissors from myself today! Bravo, it’s beautiful!

  86. Autumn responded on 25 Jan 2011 at 12:41 am #

    You look fantastic!

    I did much the same thing–chopped off a lot of hair on a whim, just me and my scissors–several years ago, and honestly it was one of the best things I’ve ever done for myself. I did it because I wanted to see what I looked like if I made myself “ugly” (I was a long-hair do or die until that very moment)–and lo and behold, short hair is becoming. On me and a lot of women–it lets us show our faces instead of hide them. I say this same thing to other women who would say “Oh, I could never get away with that”–as if it’s a miniature bank robbery instead of a haircut–and nobody ever believes me. Your pictures here are proof!

    I’m back to long hair right now, though. It’s fucking cold out there.

  87. Emmi responded on 15 Mar 2011 at 2:23 pm #

    I am a fan of the ‘do! It brings out your eyes.

  88. Rac responded on 05 Apr 2011 at 3:47 pm #

    Looks pretty good, but I still LOVE long hair on women.

  89. Eat the Damn Cake » Going all the way responded on 24 Jun 2011 at 3:01 pm #

    [...] keep telling me I’m so bold, for cutting off as much as I did, last time. For having short hair in the first place. But what I’d really wanted was something much [...]

  90. Eat the Damn Cake » going braless responded on 15 Aug 2011 at 12:48 pm #

    [...] reason why I didn’t want to do yet another hair post was because I am afraid of seeming kind of obsessed. I think a reader left a comment to this effect [...]

  91. Eat the Damn Cake » you should pull it off anyway, even if you can’t pull it off responded on 27 Apr 2012 at 7:07 am #

    [...] well-defined enough, I am not skinny enough, my eyes are not big enough.) But I don’t care. I cut my hair off anyway. Because it feels good. Because it is simple. Because I am always comfortable and it never snarls [...]

  92. Eat the Damn Cake » i like the person i am without my hair responded on 15 May 2012 at 6:51 pm #

    [...] This is the story of the first time I cut off all my hair. [...]

  93. Meg responded on 05 Nov 2012 at 5:11 pm #

    You did a fantastic job! A hairstylist chopped my hair a few months ago, and I’ve been building up the courage to trim it all myself (money is tight, yo). Seeing how well yours turned out is very encouraging. :D

  94. Eat the Damn Cake » being friends with a pixie girl responded on 11 Dec 2012 at 11:14 am #

    [...] I cut all my hair off a couple of years ago, I stopped slouching for the first time. I stood up straight because there was nothing to hide [...]