I feel very much the same way when people tell me that they could never pull off blue or purple hair. And I tell them so. “The reason I can do it,” I tell them, “is because I like it. If you want to, you can too. (Though green is maybe more difficult, and I don’t think I do so well with that one either.)” They never believe me. But it is always true. I am just some girl. As, often, are they. And if not, they are just some guy, and it would work equally well.

And. So’s I can maybe avoid carrying on commenting on EVERY SINGLE POST I READ FROM NOW UNTIL THE TIME I GO TO SLEEP, I recently discovered the concept of “jolie-laide”, or, less pleasantly, “pretty-ugly”. Which means, basically, being beautiful because you look different and have the personality to pull it off. (Hint: you always, always do.) It was a bit of a revelation for me. If you do not know it already, it might also seem pretty lovely to you. It may not be the prettiest term for the idea, though it is French and therefore shiny to us anglophones. But it’s a very compelling, and, I think, very useful, idea. It allows for charisma and intelligence without textbook prettiness amongst females. I know, as you do, from firsthand experience, that this is a real and viable thing. But not enough of us do. I found it very empowering. I think I’m gonna keep it.

I was (and am, a little) afraid of looking mannish, and afraid that the exposing hairstyle doesn’t match my introverted personality. I can count on one hand the number of young women I know (even in all of facebook land) with short hair. I’ve seen ONE other pixie since I got mine. Suddenly, I’m different, which I’ve never been before.

In the looks department, I’ve always been really average / ideal-fitting / boring. People thought I was politically conservative, simply based on my looks. I don’t think I was taken as seriously professionally (not to mention I look about 18 and I’m 26).

Now I wear bright lipstick and dresses, and my previously boring feminine outfits suddenly are kind of cool. Now I look my age (I think. Mostly because I’ve made a decision one way or the other about my appearance.)

Now I don’t have to act prettily or try to keep or maintain a dude’s attention because of my looks. (That’s the idea anyway. Not sure if I have it down yet.)

When I first got it cut, my stylists’ husband and 19-year old son said I shouldn’t do it. After, her son high-fived me.

And that’s what it feels like. Even if it’s not attractive, it’s like a high-five to myself.

When I’m feeling insecure about it (like when I wake up and my hair is sticking every which way and I’m wearing my boyfriend’s shirt), I think of the awesome chicks who awesomely rock their short hair. And I think, I’d like to be someone Kate looks at on the subway and thinks I’m interesting.

And actually, I often catch myself feeling stylish But it’s my own style. Which I like better.