Nicky eats a cake pop and talks about recovery and a motorcycle

Where do you live? I live on a tiny island amongst a cluster of islands in the English Channel, just above France. My little Island is called Jersey, measuring only 9 by 5 miles. We have beaches, potatoes and Jersey cows. And cake, of course. I like to be close to the sea, its in my blood.

What’s one of the coolest things you’ve ever done? I mean, that you can think of right now. The coolest thing I have ever done is probably travelling around India on an old Enfield Motorcycle called ‘Pujar’ (pray). Being on that bike was like a high, I have never felt as free as I did then. Warm Indian air whipping past our bodies as we climbed up mountainside roads, chasing dreams and destinations. If I had magic slippers, India is where they would take me.

 

what’s the story behind this picture? This picture was taken on my 27th birthday, my newest friend Lucy had been collecting birthday presents for me since we met 8 months earlier. We sat on the pavement outside her block of flats. It was like a present picnic, neat little parcel after neat little parcel, trinkets, treasures, treats and an apron until finally the big one…

 

I untied the ribbons and opened the lid to reveal 6 perfectly formed cake pops. 3 were in the shape of floral tea pots and 3 the shape of slices of cake. We sat bathed in the afternoon sunshine, and shared the first cake pop biting into its deliciously cake like truffle, in awe of its hand crafted magic. That was a very special birthday moment. I have since embraced the joy of cake pop moments attempting, both successfully and not quite so successfully to make them in variety of wonderous colours and flavours (some with glitter and others without), my boyfriend Jamie is my greatest cake pop fan, he loves them the most and he is brilliant.

what goal did you think you wouldn’t reach but then did?  I suffered with an eating disorder for 10 years. For a long time I believed I could never escape it, I tried every therapy I could and thought it futile. Then one day it was like I just decided to stop hating myself and trust my body. I set myself free. I walked away from a relationship that trapped me and set off into the world. I wont pretend like it didn’t try and rear its ugly head again but each time I was stronger and got out of it quicker. Now I have completely recovered and have a new found love and respect for my body. Every time I eat cake it is like a small celebration of this fact. I try to eat cake every day. My cake today is a blueberry muffin, with a crumble topping and an oozing blackberry jam centre, wrapped in pink patisserie paper. And a giant mug of tea. Cake has to have tea.

Looking back I can’t even begin to describe the torment of living with this condition every day for so long. Its like a form of self torture, except really I was never the one who needed punishing. I just want to scoop up that tiny, scared, little girl who suffered every day and tell her she is brave enough to survive and will come out the other side, strong and beautiful and glowing. And thats me, strong. I did it, I got there in the end. Except its not the end, because now I have my whole life ahead of me and I am not afraid anymore.

My unroast: I have superb eyebrows, big, dark and perfectly formed. I can make them look good no matter how the rest of me is feeling. I was complemented regularly in India for my eyebrows, and often got ushered into threading parlours for them to perfect my look. Threading is an awesome indulgence that I still like to partake in, but none yet as good as my 30p roadside bargains.

*   *   *

If you have a cake pic and a story, send them to me at kate@eatthedamncake.com! 

11 Comments »

Kate on August 31st 2012 in cake eaters

11 Responses to “Nicky eats a cake pop and talks about recovery and a motorcycle”

  1. Krystina responded on 31 Aug 2012 at 1:18 pm #

    This is a sweet gal. Totally jealous of her eyebrows. I draw mine on every morning for work and sometimes I think I look like a villian from a Disney movie. I have never eaten a cake pop but they sound awesome. I’m happy for Nicky! <3

  2. San D responded on 31 Aug 2012 at 1:44 pm #

    Congratulations on cutting the bond of fear and flying free.

  3. morgaine responded on 31 Aug 2012 at 2:04 pm #

    “Its like a form of self torture, except really I was never the one who needed punishing.”

    Preach it.

  4. katilda responded on 31 Aug 2012 at 3:10 pm #

    well this is fantastic! her story gave me little chills. i love the bravery.

  5. Carrie responded on 31 Aug 2012 at 3:33 pm #

    “I just want to scoop up that tiny, scared, little girl who suffered every day and tell her she is brave enough to survive”
    Thank you. That is exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you.

  6. Kellie responded on 31 Aug 2012 at 3:46 pm #

    Profound and beautiful. And, yes, those are the best eyebrows I have ever seen.

  7. Dorothy responded on 31 Aug 2012 at 7:57 pm #

    Beautiful story – thanks for sharing Nicky.

  8. Mara responded on 31 Aug 2012 at 9:54 pm #

    I love that picture! Everything about it is beautiful. Very cute sunglasses and apron, btw. Also, I am now craving cake pops. I’ve never had one before, but they just sound so delicious that I really want one now anyway. ^_^
    Alas, I know not how to obtain one.
    Anyway. Love your story. :)

  9. birdy responded on 01 Sep 2012 at 7:47 am #

    I am so glad you were able to get past your demons…. and that you TRY to eat CAKE EVERY day. Many more people should have that as a goal! :D

    And to Mara… they have cake pops at Starbucks. I know because my boss’s boss sometimes brings them to us at work (I work with really awesome people!) they are AMAZING, getcha some! lol

  10. Rosanne responded on 03 Sep 2012 at 4:16 pm #

    great story and a great picture! also: YES to cake & tea!

  11. raquel responded on 04 Sep 2012 at 11:14 am #

    i loved this — thanks for sharing your joy.

Trackback URI | Comments RSS

Leave a Reply