I am pregnant

So I’m pregnant. I have been for a while, but I was being all traditional about it and waiting until the second trimester to say anything. And here we are! God, I can’t believe I made it. I have been SO SICK. So sick. Holy shit. I can’t even describe how unprepared I was.

I am like an alien creature that earth scientists have locked in a cage and injected with horrible viruses and I have been plotting my escape this entire time. I’ve been keeping myself sane by imagining, over and over again, what I will do when I am free. First, I will kill my captors. And then I will eat fried chicken. I will eat at all of the restaurants recommended by Serious Eats in their email newsletter. They have taunted me for too long. For too long, I have been unable to properly feed.

This whole thing is crazily weird. Apparently, there is a baby inside of me. It wasn’t there a few months ago, and now it is, and I am still myself, I think, but I am going to be a person who is a mother. It’s like there is a gap between my complicated, full thoughts and my ability to express them, even to myself. And in that gap, there’s a baby.

So let me start again. This is the story of when I found out I was pregnant. Because I write to calm myself down when I’m freaking out, I wrote it as it happened:


Both of the tests say yes. Yes+

Both of them, but I still don’t really believe.

It’s been like 45 min and Bear is unreachable. Mom is on the phone and staying on the phone until he contacts me. My heart is still beating hard.

I only took the test so that I’d stop thinking about it. I was so ready for a NO that when the yes came up my whole body just STOPPED.

It is 6:25 on Nov 15th. I might be pregnant.

This is surreal. I was so sure I was getting my period. But it hasn’t really happened. I still think it might happen.

Is there actually something that will be a person inside me?

Something that will one day not even care that it was there?

No way.

Life is so insane.

Mom is already telling me about painless birth and we’re already arguing.

Dad looked up the due date. July 29th or 24th, I think. Which doesn’t mean much right now.

It will probably die first, right? I’ll miscarry. In like two days.

But I also feel like it won’t.

God. What about my life?

I feel like I’m liveblogging right now.

I just made this decision right now. And now I have a yes+

It is now 7:21 and I’m on the phone with dad. Haven’t gotten off the phone.

Still no Bear. He must be in a meeting. He had a really big meeting today.

I am smiling incessantly

On a fundamental level I am really, really happy

8:07 Bear finally called! On his work phone. He was like “is it emergency?” I said “no,” in a totally cool voice. He told me he’d be home in an hour or so. I asked if he could come sooner.


“I’m pregnant.”

“Oh. What?”

“I’m pregnant.”

“Are you sure? I’m coming home right now”

“I took two tests.”

“Are you happy?”

“Yes, I’m just in shock”

“Me too, but I’m really happy.”


“Ok, I’m leaving now!”


I called Jake but he didn’t pick up and texted to say he was about to play a concert.

I called Gabe and he picked up, in transit, as always, at the store, and was so happy. “That’s, like, a big life thing,” he said. “You’re, like, a grownup now.”

“But I feel like a kid, so I’m screwed,” I said.

“I’m going to be an uncle before my 21st birthday,” he said. “That’s badass. I was having a bad day but this is like the best news ever!”

I keep wandering back over to the sticks to look at the “yes”

*   *   *

People who have been pregnant/are pregnant– how did you react when you found out? When I imagined it, I thought I would cry from joy, but when it happened I was too shocked.

Unroast: Today I love the way I look in the skin-tight dress I bought to celebrate the second trimester. I bought it the first time I could drag myself out to a store. The salesman saw me looking at it, and he said, “You can’t gain an ounce in that one!” And I said, “Well, I’m about to gain like thirty pounds.” So I bought it, because it’s stretchy and I want to show off my belly. (you can totally see the waistline of my leggings here– sorry)


Kate on January 29th 2013 in body, life, pregnancy

139 Responses to “I am pregnant”

  1. Rapunzel responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 8:30 am #

    And you look so fab!
    Is that in your house? ‘Cause that wall paper is amazing.

  2. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 8:31 am #

    Thank you!!!!!!!!!!
    And yes!! I am so proud of that wallpaper! (Even though if you look closely, you can see that it’s accidentally upside down)

  3. Erin Lee responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 8:39 am #

    Congrats! This is awesome! I was wondering what you came down with this month to put you out for so long. Gosh i hope i don’t feel like that someday!
    Congrats again!

  4. Aezy responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 8:42 am #

    Congratulations!!! Ah I am so thrilled for you! I hope that the second trimester is much much better than the first and you get the lovely pregnant lady glow rather than swollen ankles etc. I am super thrilled because you are such a lovely person and I know you will make lovely people and the world needs more of them! So again, congratulations!!

  5. Allyson responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 8:43 am #


  6. Heather responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 8:44 am #

    Congratulations! And you look amazing in that dress :)

  7. Emmi responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 8:46 am #

    Kate! You look amazing! You are full of BABY! Mazel tov :D

    I was wondering why you hadn’t posted much and was hoping you weren’t ill. Well you were, but all for a good cause! I am so, so happy for you. I know so many people our age that if they told me they were pregnant I would be all, “Oh! Oh…uhh….that’s….great?”, but with you I feel nothing but joy and rightness and YES. I know it must be so weird for you, but I think this will be incredibly amazing for you, Bear & the forthcoming cub.

  8. Steph responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 8:55 am #

    Best news ever Kate!!!!! Congratulations!!!!!

  9. Sonja responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 8:59 am #

    Congratulations! I had a feeling you might be pregnant because you’ve blogged so little (on this site) in the last few months.
    When I found out I was pregnant, I was overjoyed… for about five minutes. Then I thought about how I was destroying my/our really pretty awesome status quo. I have pictures of myself on the day I found out and I look a bit like a deer in the headlights. The shock dissipated fairly quickly though.
    The second time I got pregnant, I skipped the shock part almost entirely.

  10. arora responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 9:15 am #

    Congratulations..I can’t even imagine..You will be an amazing mother

  11. Sarah responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 9:16 am #


    You’re gonna be an incredible mom. No doubt in my mind.

  12. Sarah Greesonbach responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 9:16 am #

    Ahhh! Congrats!! Just Ahhh!

  13. Tasha responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 9:28 am #

    You look amazing in that dress. Congratulations. Is it selfish to say I am looking forward to reading about your experiences as a mom? I relate to a lot of your self-image articles and anxieties, so I imagine it will put me at ease a little for my future plans (though I only just got engaged, so I’m a little ways off for that stuff).

  14. Ashley responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 9:39 am #


    Why is it traditional to wait to reveal a pregnancy anyway?

  15. Lindsey responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 9:41 am #

    I was going to say something about how if there’s any justice in the world, you’ll have a girl. Because the little girls of the world deserve mothers like I know you’ll be – a strong and guiding hand, a force to be reckoned with. The kind of mom who will call her daughter “smart” and “brave” and “funny” just as often as she calls her “pretty,” so that her daughter learns that prettiness does not come above all other virtues. But then I realized that you will be the kind of mom that all the little boys in the world should have, too – the kind of woman who teaches her son to treat women with respect. The kind of mom who lets her son play with all the toys, regardless of their intended gender-appropriateness. The kind of mom who teaches her son to be kind and generous.

    What I think I’m trying to say is that you’re going to knock this out of the park. I’m so happy for you. This world desperately needs parents like the one you’re going to be.

  16. Danielle responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 9:42 am #

    Congratulations!!! You have started the most incredible journey of your life!! I’m due with baby #2 in about 6 weeks, and even the second time around its an amazing process. Like you, both times, I was so prepared to see a “no” on the test that I practically exploded from confusion when I saw the “Yes” even though it was the “Yes” that I really wanted.
    I wish you all the best– an easy pregnancy and a healthy baby, and I wish that you may experience the same joy in your body that I have during pregnancy. This coming from someone who always felt like I was fighting against my body. Pregnancy made me appreciate it in brand new ways. Love your belly every day!!

  17. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 9:42 am #

    Thank you so much, guys!!! I really appreciate the congratulations– and I figured some of you would probably catch on since I’ve been so MIA :-)

    It is not selfish and it makes me feel better about wanting to write about all this as it happens! Congratulations on your engagement!!!

  18. Samantha Angela responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 9:43 am #


    Congratulations! You’re going to make a hell of a mother.

  19. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 9:44 am #

    God, you’re nice. I’m incredibly touched.
    Bear really wants a girl, and I have always sort of imagined having one, but for some reason, I keep thinking of this baby as a boy. Not that that means so much.

  20. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 9:45 am #

    I think mostly it’s done that way just because miscarriage is much more likely before the second trimester, and the miscarriage numbers are surprisingly high, so sometimes people tell everyone and then, when everyone continues to ask and congratulate them later, they have to keep breaking the painful news that the baby is gone.

  21. Mandy responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 9:49 am #

    Congratulations, sweetie! I’m delighted for you both (or should I say, all three of you!)
    I’ve never had children, myself (by choice) but from everything I hear, it’s an amazing adventure.
    And we know you love adventures!

  22. Aïsha responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:11 am #

    Congratulations! That’s wonderful news. I had feeling you you were pregnant. And I almost wanted to tell you to get pregnant soon because I am (23 weeks) and I always appreciate your thoughts on any topic; they help me make sense of my own thoughts and feelings. All the best for you and the little one. Nausea should soon get better. You might not believe it yet but the 2nd trimester is great.

  23. Cari Ellen responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:12 am #

    Hello beautiful Momma!!!!! Of course I have been bursting with this news! Happy doesn’t begin to describe how I feel for you and Bear and, um, let me see, YOUR PARENTS!!! Like someone said above – you are going to completely rock as a Mom, and like someone else said, I am soooooo looking forward to sharing the journey with you, through your writing. When I saw the post today I couldn’t read fast enough – every word so filled with emotion and meaning – I am going to savor this!!! Oh, and, can I interest you in some pregnancy photos???? :) xoxoxoxoxo

  24. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:15 am #

    First of all, your name is gorgeous.
    Second of all, congratulations yourself!! I can’t friggin’ WAIT to be at 23 weeks. So jealous. How are you feeling??

  25. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:16 am #

    @Cari Ellen
    Hey!!! Are you kidding me, I CAN’T WAIT to be in your photos. Mom said that was going to be her gift to me (I hope I’m not ruining that surprise if she hadn’t told you), and I was like, “BEST GIFT EVER!” I love your work.

    Although, if I look terrible, I’ll probably write a depressed post about how even your stunning photos couldn’t make me look stunning :p

  26. amy responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:25 am #

    Congrats!! So happy for you! Now that you can eat again, let me know what you’re craving and we’ll do a yum battle in your honor.

  27. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:27 am #

    That ROCKS!!

    Unfortunately, there’s a bit of a complication there. I’ll write about it soon…

  28. Rachel F. responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:28 am #

    Two great things in this: 1) Yay you! 2) I didn’t know there was a serious eats newsletter. I’m not signed up. If you want eating company, I am always down for food adventures.

  29. Betsy responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:30 am #

    Congratulations! What beautiful news! Motherhood is intense but just wait, you have so much joy coming your way.

    When I found out I was pregnant, I was shocked and ran out to buy more tests! I must have taken 6 of them. I just couldn’t believe it. After I told my husband, things felt much more real and then it was like a switch flipped and I was overwhelmed with how much I loved that little baby and started researching everything I could think of -pregnancy, labor, delivery, early childhood development, etc. so I could learn as much as possible to be the best I could be for my little one.

    You are going to be such a dear mother to your baby. The only advice I can offer is to be gentle with yourself. It can be hard when things don’t go according to your plans -like the labor or nursing or a million other things. But just know, no one knows and loves your baby more than you and your husband do and the three of you are figuring everything out together and it gets easier. You’ll be an amazing mother. :)

  30. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:32 am #

    @Rachel F
    YES. It is amazing. I have spent hours scrolling through food pics and reviews. And I always want eating company!

  31. Call Me Jo responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:44 am #

    Congratulations! Welcome to the weird and wacky world of pregnancy! I’m mid-journey myself and excited to have such an astute companion.

    I took my test around 3am, because I had to get up to use the bathroom. I stared at the + then snuck back into bed, trying to decide how to break the news to my husband. Then I realized that he was awake. I whispered, “We’re going to have a baby.” He hugged me and then we cuddled together and giggled and tried to wrap our heads around this enormous thing that was going to happen.

  32. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:45 am #

    @Call me Jo

    I read in a pregnancy book that you’re NEVER supposed to tell your partner on the phone. I blew that one :-)

  33. Bethany responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:48 am #

    CONGRATULATIONS!!!! That is so awesome and exciting.

  34. Tanja responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:50 am #

    It’s going to be a fantastic ride :D

    But bleh for the MS, it’s the pits and really is a special kind of hell. I hope it ends soon!

    And the shock thing is normal, I’ve had it each time, I think it’s because whether expected & wanted or not it means you’ll never be quite the same again. This is not a bad thing, but it is certainly a big thing :)

  35. Janet T responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:51 am #

    Kate- congrats of course. Had a feeling this was what you were going through the last couple of months.
    To answer your question- when I found out I was pregnant with my now 25 year old son, I sat down and cried. I told my husband it would ruin our lives, he held me and assured me it wouldn’t. I had a lot to learn about babies, and it was a long curve for me. I had a lot to learn about myself too. but there is no love on earth like what you feel for your child, it is mind blowing and heart bursting. Even these many years later, most of my dearest memories are of my babies. I love them for the people they have grown to be, but I still see that baby that my heart holds dear.

  36. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:55 am #

    @Janet T
    What a comforting comment for me to read! I know NOTHING about babies. And I love that you have these amazing memories of yours. I hope I’ll have those, too, one day.

  37. Yara responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 11:04 am #

    First, congratulations!

    The first time I found out I was pregnant, I was shocked. We weren’t planning to have kids for a while, like, not until we’d payed off the student loans for fashion design school that I had just graduated from like 10 weeks before. We told my dad, and my sister, and then my mom. She was able to wait about an hour before telling everyone, which was miraculous because we went to a birthday party that day.
    The second time, I was confused. I’d gone off birth control expecting my fertility to return “in about a year” but it took about a week. So, that was surprising and exciting.
    The third time, I was ecstatic because we’d been wanting to get pregnant for months. I think that time I cried the tears of joy. Then I realized that baby wasn’t letting me have coffee, and even though he’s 4 now, I still haven’t completely forgiven him for those 9 months of not being able to grab a cup of coffee ;)

  38. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 11:07 am #

    Love this.
    The day I found out I was pregnant, I’d just had this huge conversation where I was saying that I didn’t think I was really ready, and even though I’d gone of birth control I was thinking of waiting a while to actually try. I think it was about 2 weeks after going off birth control. So damn fast that nothing seemed to make sense. I guess that’s life sometimes!
    Also, I’ve been cheating a bit with the coffee and having some…

  39. Lynn responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 11:07 am #

    YAY!!! That is wonderful Kate, I’m so happy for you :) I wish you happy healthy pregnancy and thank you for always being real :)

  40. Melanie responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 11:11 am #

    Yay!!!!! I’m so happy for you guys. I have another friend in New York who is due in May. I’m sending out her care package next month. It’s baby season. Hehe.

    You will make a fabulous mommy, and Bear a fabulous daddy.

  41. Cindy responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 11:23 am #

    Congratulations! Like everyone else, I am super excited for you! (Is it weird that I feel like we’re friends from reading your blog, and that makes me extra excited for you?)

    Anyway! I hope you start feeling better soon, and I can’t wait to hear all about your journey. Maybe Bear will write a guest post??? Best of luck!

  42. D responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 11:49 am #

    OOO congratulations! How exciting!

  43. San D responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 11:49 am #

    Congrats to you and Bear!♥

  44. Amy responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 11:49 am #

    BTW, when I first told the husband I was pregnant, I was sitting outside on a late spring day with our dog and our bunny rabbit. Shortly after that, our rabbit died. Unrelated, yes, but it’s still the memory I have of first being pregnant: OMG! I killed my rabbit!

  45. janetha responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 11:59 am #

    Congrats! You are gonna be a great mom.

  46. Haley responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 12:00 pm #

    Congratulations! This is exciting, selfishly, for me too. So many of the women who write the blogs I read have had babies in the past couple years, but you feel so much more real to me, so much more like myself. I am looking forward to reading about your journey. :)

  47. Kiannah responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 12:18 pm #

    Congratulations Kate!!!! I just about eeeeeped when I saw the title :D Thank you so much for sharing your journey with all of us. You’re radiating feminine, motherly beauty already!

  48. Sonya responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 12:26 pm #

    Kate, I don’t even know you, but a massive congratulations to you. And everything about that last photo is incredibly beautiful. Congrats again!

  49. Steff responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 12:33 pm #

    Aaagh, what joyous news — congratulations! Also, you look like an earth goddess in that dress with your forthcoming bundle of awesome. :)

  50. Liz responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 12:36 pm #

    OMG, I’m pregnant toooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)
    I’ve also been keeping it quiet and I just hit 12 weeks today :)

    Congrats to you and Bear!!!!!

  51. Katrina Blanchalle responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 12:38 pm #

    Show off that beautiful belly! Wonderful mama-to-be, I am very excited for you and your lucky baby. (for Bear, too. ;) )

  52. Liz responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 12:47 pm #

    Oh. My “learning I’m pregnant” story.

    In France, it doesn’t matter how many home tests you take – everyone is still required to go to the lab and get the blood test. So, because I have a missed period, like, twice a year, I didn’t bother buying any home tests. When I went to my doctor for something else, she reminded me that I was a month late.
    I went to the lab, they had the results in about 2 hours – and I was in complete shock. Called my husband, and he was in complete shock. We figured (for some reason) that it’d take longer, but we only “stopped not trying” for two months lol
    After the initial shock was over, we are both soooooo happy about it. It’s weird though :)

  53. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 12:55 pm #

    CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! How are you doing?? I felt like a HERO when I hit 12 weeks. That day was when I got the dress :-) I felt like I was living for that moment.

  54. Danielle responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 12:55 pm #

    WHAAAAA! How exciting for you! Congrats!

  55. Amy responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 12:59 pm #

    Hooray, Kate!
    I am 23 weeks along and it is pretty awesome. This pregnancy wasn’t exactly planned so when I saw the + I just about passed out. That lasted for about 3 seconds and then I was happy. I went home and just pointed at my tummy and told my fiancee, ” Hey guess what? There’s a baby in there.” He’s super psyched about being a dad.
    You and Bear are going to be awesome parents!!!!!

  56. Liz responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:01 pm #


    I’ve been sick as a dog! No vomiting, but severe nausea and the FATIGUE. Oh man. Go to bed at about 8:30pm in order to function at work all day. Walking helps; I walk about 4 miles a day.
    Today is the first time that food tastes good :)
    The cravings have started, and the depressing thing is that I’m craving American things that are literally impossible to get – cause it’s things like Taco Bell, Doritos, king cakes, or… Annie’s Organic Alfredo Shells and Cheddar (very specific, I know).

  57. olivia responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:03 pm #

    woowwww… congratulations!!

  58. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:07 pm #

    Hooray for food tasting good again!!! God, that’s a triumph! And I can’t even believe you can walk MILES every day! How do you do that?? I’ve barely been able to drag myself outside.
    And I can’t tell you how many boxes of Annie’s shells and cheddar I’ve consumed in the past few months….

  59. rowdygirl responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:09 pm #

    Happy, Happy Baby Day ! This is wonderful news and you look absolutely beautiful. Truly glowing !
    I can’t say I know what you’re feeling (infertile myrtle here) but I’m thrilled for you.
    Looking forward to all your new musings :)

    Best Wishes,

  60. Kimmy Sue Ruby Lou responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:09 pm #

    Beautiful news…just wait, your body is going to be even more curvy and womanly after giving birth…it’s freaking awesome! Yippeee…you and Bear will be wonderful parents!

  61. Kim responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:09 pm #

    Congratulations, Kate! What a great read! So happy for you … I hope the nausea goes away soon so you can indulge!

  62. Liz responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:13 pm #

    lol I was pretty active before the pregnancy, but doing my usual (zumba, aerobics, etc.) was too much. I just started to walk to and from work to make up for it, and the round-trip is about 4 miles. It’s not bad at all since I’m “going somewhere”, you know?
    I found that I could buy Annie’s in bulk on Amazon, but they don’t ship international :( I’m in the midst of trying to convince a family member to let me ship it to her and then she’ll mail it to me. I’m desperate!!!!

  63. Allyson responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:15 pm #

    You are GORGEOUS.

    Congratulations. :-)

  64. Alexis responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:18 pm #

    Ahhhh! Im so happy for you! It’s odd how I feel happy about a baby that I will most likely never meet, however, I have been reading you blog for about three years and I generally care about your happiness. I think many of your other reader feel the same. You are going to be a great mom! Congratulations! Enjoy yourself during this time. Don’t be scared. Everything will be great! :)

  65. Alpana Trivedi responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:22 pm #

    Congratulations, sweetie.

  66. Christine responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:32 pm #

    Wow! I saw Rachel Rabbit White’s piece on Thought Catalog last night & it passed my mind “Hm, is this Kate from Eat the Damn Cake?” How exciting :) .

    I can’t wait to hear your perspective on the changes a woman’s body undergoes when pregnant, if you choose to write about it. And if not, nonetheless my best wishes for a healthy little one & a complication free pregnancy!

  67. Sarah S responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:33 pm #

    Oh, Kate! Congratulations! (I kinda wondered when you went semi-underground for a few months. I was hoping it was a pregnancy, not a crisis. Yippee!!). You will be an awesome mom. :)

  68. anon responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:33 pm #

    I read your blog a lot but I never comment. for some wierd reason, I’m very happy for you. Congratulations and good luck with the baby

  69. J. responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:42 pm #

    Congratulations, what wonderful, lovely news. I am exactly 13 weeks with my 4th, and feel rather excited that I will get to read you about going through pregnancy when we are at the same stage. Oh, and by the way, it never does get less amazing.

  70. Karen responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 2:07 pm #

    Congratulations! I’m so happy for you, that’s such great news. And being a bit ‘oldfashioned’ about that is good I think. It’s nice to be old fashioned about certain things.
    Also is it weird that I’m like excited that you found out on my birthday? Hahaha.

  71. melbo responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 2:22 pm #

    Oh this is great news for you! Congratulations. =)

    It does feel strange, emotionally and physically. It’s never quite what you think it will be.

    I remember feeling a little disconnected from it all. Happy, very happy. But still a little apart from everything.

    You look great in that dress and I think it was the perfect choice. Wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy!

  72. Erin Lee responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 2:33 pm #

    and BTW, the dress looks fab – I have always wanted to be one of those women who can pull of form-fitting clothes while pregnant. I have a feeling I’ll just look like a mushy lump. We’ll see… someday!

  73. Corinne responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 2:38 pm #

    Thought something was funny that you have been sick so often as of late…..it’s like I know you!
    My daughter is 9 years old…and when I found out I had been married not even a year! Total surprise….best surprise ever. I called everyone…even though it was so early.
    She is my gift in this world..as she is all mine.

    Enjoy every moment.

  74. Jo B responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 2:41 pm #


  75. Amanda responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 2:49 pm #

    That is absolutely fabulous news — congrats!!

    I think my reaction when I realized I was pregnant both times was pure, unadulterated shock. I wasn’t “trying” either time and, although I was happy (I’d always wanted children) it took a bit for it to set in!

    I loathed the first trimester, by the way. All I could keep down was saltines, salsa, and McDonald’s. It was an interesting diet. Second trimester was much better :)

  76. Krystina responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 2:55 pm #

    Congrats Kate!!!! I am very excited for you and Bear! Ya’ll will make wonderful parents. :)

  77. Also Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 3:23 pm #

    Ahhhhhhhhh. Congratulations!!! I am so happy for you.

    If I’m honest, I’m also a little jealous, since we are close to the same age and I’ve been wanting to be pregnant for a while, but it’s not in the cards for me right now. (Not even the accidental cards… it’s going to take some SCIENCE to manage it.) Which I think is ok, since bringing a person into the world isn’t something I feel comfortable doing just because I want to, you know? When I am ready to write about pregnancy in the way you did here in November, then I think it will be time to investigate the SCIENCE.

    Anyway, you look so happy and excited and comfortable with yourself in those pictures. Here’s wishing you good health and good spirits for the rest of the pregnancy, and I hope we get to hear more about it, if and when you feel up to it. :)

  78. Shula responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 3:40 pm #

    Mazel tov! So happy and excited for you! My husband and I have been trying, but its not been in the cards yet. I hope you enjoy every part of the experience, or well as much as you can. Kind of hard to enjoy the being sick part. Also totally wonderful of you in that dress.

  79. Hillary E. responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 3:45 pm #

    Oh, so happy for you both! Beautiful pictures- I wish I had taken pictures of me pregnant- there are only a couple for both of my babies.

    The first time I found out I was pregnant was the morning of my grandmother’s funeral… it was really, really hard not to smile inappropriately the whole day. The second time I was completely in shock. My second husband was pretty sure he couldn’t have kids (he adopted mine). I was taking the test ‘just to be sure’ because I had the thought, “I haven’t been this tired since I was pregnant…” And then I was. Pregnant. I don’t think it sunk in until he was actually here that I was going back to diapers and toddlers and breastfeeding. So I have an 8 year old and an 18 month old now and I love it, love them both. You will be an awesome mother, thoughtful and reflective. And while I agree that girls deserve awesome women like you, boys need strong women too :)

  80. Liz E responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 4:04 pm #

    Congratulations! Your world view is about to change forever and that is a good thing. My son is 32 and I still feel that special pull whenever we are together. I now have my granddaughter with me most days and that is a new and different joy. I think you will be a wonderful mother. Your blog makes me smile. I look forward to your coming adventures.

  81. Rosanne responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 4:33 pm #

    Kate, this is such exciting news! Congratulations to you and Bear! I hope you feel better soon and I look forward to more pretty pictures and great stories.

  82. Anna responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 4:49 pm #

    Congratulations Kate! One helluva lucky kid!

  83. Kristin responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 5:08 pm #

    I KNEW IT!!! Or at least, I wondered, when you said you were so sick. Seriously, I can’t stop smiling right now. I’m so, so happy for you. Other people have already said this so well, but I think you’re going to be an AMAZING mother!! I echo Lindsey that both little boys and little girls could use a mother like you. And every time you feel pathetically tired or ill, just remember that you are creating a person out of NOTHING. Like a boss.

    To answer your question, for our first, I was in complete shock when the test came out positive. I decided to climb in the tub and take a bath, which always helps me not freak out. My husband came in and started laughing – I was so distracted I had forgotten to take off my baseball hat, so I still had it on my head as I sat naked in the tub!

    We’re 26 weeks along now with our second – can’t wait to enjoy any pregnancy related posts you share.

  84. R responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 5:21 pm #

    Way to go! Mazle tov!! Extra exclamation marks!!!! :D

    Crazy that you got pregnant immediately. That must have made it an extra shock. I’m convinced that when I start trying it will take eons and then I’ll be infertile anyway. Especially since I’ve been on the pill for a decade. Did you have that quiet worry that I dunno. . . reproduction wouldn’t work like they told us despite generations of it doing so?

    Also, I agree that HOLY SHIT THAT WALLPAPER IS AWESOME! I mean, not more awesome than your future bear cub. But I can’t have your cub for myself (in all likelihood…), and maybe I CAN have that wallpaper. Where did you get it?

  85. Gaye Pauroso responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 5:21 pm #

    Congratulations! Sorry you’ve been feeling not so hot, but you look great! :)

  86. Anna responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 5:45 pm #

    Mazel Tov Kate! I’m really happy for you and Bear and the lucky baby!

  87. Sara responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 5:53 pm #

    Congratulations! So happy for you and Bear! Also, go you for taking the dress, for it is sexy and awesome.

  88. Sheryl responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 6:02 pm #

    Congrats to you both! I hope the rest of this journey goes smoothly for you. Can’t wait to hear more about your take on pregnancy.

  89. Stephanie responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 6:10 pm #

    Oh my goodness, Kate, Congratulations on creating human life!!! Doesn’t that give you god-stautus? Thus, you are a life-bearing goddess! I like you so much, though we don’t even actually know each other, isn’t that such a strange phenomenon? I am so excited to hear all your thoughts about this unbelievably new time in your life. Know that whenever you are in doubt, write more! I am endlessly curious about your thoughts and experiences, so the more you share the better. I hope that doesn’t sound creepy. You are just such a wonderful and interesting human being! So, please tell us everything! :-)

    Mozel Tov!

  90. Gaby responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 6:28 pm #

    Woohoo, congratulations Kate and Bear :) ! You look so happy and content in those photos.

  91. miliet responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 6:52 pm #

    “Long time reader, first time posting” Héhé.

    I’m really really really glad you’re so happy Kate!
    Your blog is always a little light in my day, and now you have one in your belly too!
    I hope it’ll grow into a giant fun, happy and wonderful light. That is made of flesh.
    Or…. uh. yeah. À votre santé à vous deux quoi!

  92. Elena responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 7:10 pm #

    Congratulations again!! Loved the posts. :)

  93. bethany actually responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 7:28 pm #

    I am sitting here grinning so big, I’m so happy for you and Bear!

    I’m a mom of two girls, 8 and 2, and both times I found out I was pregnant I was in a similar state of shock, even though both babies were very much wanted and more or less planned. Pregnancy is such a weird state of being. :-) I hope the sickness abates and that you have healthy and happy second and third trimesters, resulting in a healthy baby.

    You look FABULOUS, by the way. Seriously! And I’m thrilled for you.

  94. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 7:31 pm #

    I felt exactly that way. I’d been on birth control forever and I was pretty sure it’d take me a year to get pregnant. Actually, just before I found out I was, I had this feeling of total certitude that I was definitely not pregnant. Feelings, even very, very definite ones, are not always right.

    The wallpaper is from Flavorpaper, here in Brooklyn. Awesome store. It’s expensive, because they employ a bunch of really interesting artists, but I LOVED it and decided that it would be worth it for an accent wall because it would make me happy all the time. That stuff is supposed to wear off really fast, but honestly, it still makes me happy.

  95. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 7:31 pm #

    Also, guys, these comments are incredibly sweet and you are all making me feel so loved and amazing. THANK YOU!!!!

  96. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 7:44 pm #

    That image, of you in the tub with the baseball cap….Amazing.

  97. Kate responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 7:56 pm #

    @Also Kate
    Science is seriously awesome. I’m really glad we have it.
    Now what it should do next is nanobots that can cure Bear’s diabetes!! And cancer, of course. Nanobots need to start happening soon.

  98. meredith responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 8:34 pm #

    I loved reading this because your vivid account of “the moment you found out” brought me straight back to my own pee-stick discoveries.
    Such a mind-boggling, unbelievable, immensely exciting, and scary notion, when we find out there’s A PERSON GROWING INSIDE OF US! :) )

    Both of my ‘Yes’ pregnancy tests moments were unexpected. For my first (son Felix) we’d been *trying* for many months (haaate that word trying, apologies) and I’d jumped the gun with numerous Negative result tests. I’d sort of ‘given up’ being too excited, and of course that’s when things happen. I peed on the stick, went back to the kitchen to make a sandwich, and then remembered five minutes later to go back and check. I was NOT expecting a lifechanging yes. I remember smiling and saying a lot of Oh My Gawds out loud. And how was I supposed to go back to the inane task of eating a sandwich after this!?

    The crazy part was keeping it to myself my almost 7 hours that day. My partner (teacher) had a long day at work and would be home unusually late, which I knew. I wanted to completely shock him so I played it cool and basically read pregnancy info online all day. When he got home, I said I had a treat for him (it’s common for us to buy the other a tasty nom and surprise the other). He held out his hands, closed his eyes, and in it went the positive pee stick.

    :) ohhh those moments you’ll never forget.

    My second (daughter Ivy) was a similar discovery, in that I wasn’t expecting – or planning – to be preggers. I just had a missed period and took the test to rule that out one morning – while my husband happened to be interstate for a family funeral. I was not prepared and have to admit my response was several “Oh SHITS!”, because my son was only 14 months and I’d been just finding my feet after a long struggle with post-natal depression.
    So I shared the preggie news that time via phone call, which ended up really cheering hubby up on the day on his grandfather’s funeral.
    And by that evening, I was stoked and already excited about heading in to baby numero dos.
    whoops, sorry such longwinded-ness

  99. Jayna responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 9:38 pm #

    Oh my gosh, I literally squealed out loud when I saw this! Congrats! So happy for you! :)

  100. claire responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:17 pm #

    glad you seem to be feeling better, and a major mazel tov to you and the dad/ now you made me cry again by just reading your post. Of course you made this old person very excited/ Great Grammoo

  101. Joanna Nichols responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:27 pm #

    Congrats, Kate!! Great time capsule of your thought process. Baby will crack up reading this someday!
    Welcome to the 2nd trimester “honeymoon” – enjoy! 3rd hasn’t been too bad for me either – about 6 weeks left! You look beautiful and SO happy! :)

  102. Janelle responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 10:42 pm #

    Congratulations Kate! You look absolutely radiant : ) and I love your dress!

  103. J responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 11:25 pm #

    congrats! your liveblogging made me smile wide.
    and what a gorgeous dress! you’ll show that silly salesman, alright. you look fabulous.

  104. Michele responded on 29 Jan 2013 at 11:29 pm #

    Congratulations!!! I am so happy for you and you look amazing!

  105. Jane responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 12:04 am #

    Oh, Kate, congratulations! I’m so so sorry that you have been sick; early pregnancy nausea can be really wretched (and everyone else thinks its so cute! but when it comes right down to it, feeling dreadful and wanting to throw up is basically a nightmare!!) I love that you retold your convo with bear… and that he wanted to come home right away. (good man!!!)

  106. ali responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 12:24 am #

    Congratulations!! My oldest is 13 (how did that happen??). When I found out I was pregnant my husband and I just starting laughing and crying at the same time. It was insane…we got pregnant right away (like the first month we were trying). I had very bad nausea the first trimester, but the rest of my pregnancy was great (and I didn’t have any morning sickness at all with my 2nd).

    Best wishes to you!

  107. zoe responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 12:27 am #


    the first thing i said was: OH COOL! which makes me feel lame because i don’t know you “IRL” but feel like i know you enough to have an immediate positive reaction and send you lovelovelove! congratulations to you and bear! you look beautiful in that dress, no unnecessary apologies. hope you’re feeling better! aaaand cheesy fun fact: if the little babes pops out in late july? he/she will be a cancer/leo cusp! DOPE. (i’m a dork.)

  108. Hadley responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 12:55 am #

    That’s great news. What a mom you’re gonna be.

  109. Sari responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 3:46 am #

    I definitely just read through all of these comments, smiling all the way.
    Wish I was back to be your doula!

  110. Karolina responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 5:01 am #

    Congratulations! I’m sure it’s going to be one smart, badass

  111. P Flooers responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 5:53 am #

    YAY! I am so happy for you and your family!

  112. Kande responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 7:18 am #

    Congratulations! Am sodumb that two kids later, never even associated you being “sick”/ lack of blogging = pregnancy! lol! You will be AMAZING parents!! :)

    Now as a story for you – with my first I took a trst, it said negative, I went partying, drank alcohol, maybe did some other stuff (minor not major), a few days later found the test I had responsibly took and … it was showing a clear, obvious, positive. W-T-F!!! Took second test, and ummm … yeah, positive! Was thrilled until I remembered party-night – had a heart attack/panic attack/guilt infested life until I realized that was dumb – I had at least tried to do a test, oh well if I read it wrong accidentally – the odds had been slim I was knocked up, and the two would have barely met – it’s like the booze helped their “date” :) Was the best pregnancy anyone could wish for, perfect labour and my eldest is an amazing child. No kidding -my friends started procreating after as figured all babies/kids would be like her! (wrong! haha).

    My second? We went through three years of infertility (told you the first had been a slim chance! Not only did I have untreated fertility issues at the time, but we had literally “celebrated” only once that month – and anyone who knows procreation knows that fact alone makes conception a miracle!!). Anyway, long story there cumulating with me booking an appt at a fertility centre and walking in 14 days pregnant :) So in that sense a shock but since after three years of trying I knew my cycle and symptoms inside out, I had a clue I was knocked up before taking the test. But due to the length of time it took to conceive and many disappointments along the way, I didn’t truly relax and enjoy until she was born … (and her labour is a story to be shared AFTER you deliver -focus instead on my first, which was drugfree!! :)

    Congrats again!!

  113. Jiminy responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 7:20 am #

    Congratulations!!!! I thought so! (and, bellywise,the dress is worth every penny).

    Don’t let any book and any insecurity scare you, you will make an amazing mom for sure!

  114. Caitlin responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 8:41 am #

    Congratulations! I’ve been a little worried over the past month, because your posting frequency had gone down. I’m glad it was for a good reason and not a bad one.

    I love how, in that first picture, the flash lit up the wallpaper in the shape of a heart. Maybe it’s your baby’s soul, wanting to be in his/her first picture.

  115. Greenwater responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 10:02 am #

    Congratulations to both of you. :)

  116. Becky Young responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 10:25 am #

    ummm…. WOW! Congratulations, pretty lady!!

  117. Dee responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 10:44 am #

    Congratulations! That’s fabulous!!! You’re going to be a great mom!

  118. Vicky responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 11:31 am #

    Yay, Kate!!! I’m so happy for you and Bear!!!

  119. Janet T responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 2:48 pm #

    Kate- as a side note- My 21 year old daughter’s name is Kate (not short for anything, just Kate) so last night when I excitedly announced to my husband “Kate’s pregnant!!” he took it very well, since I tell him about your blog all the time. He was quiet for just that one second though……………

  120. Kate responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 3:02 pm #

    @Janet T

  121. Terri responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 3:59 pm #

    Ahhh!!!! Congrats!!! That is fabulous. Now the lack of posts totally makes sense!

    Will you be posting mommy blogs in the near future?

  122. Raven responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 4:15 pm #

    Congratulations, Kate! And yes, that’s a fabulous dress for showing off your belly, what a catty and offensive thing for the sales clerk to say. Some of us want to flaunt what we have (I’m 30 weeks along with my SURPRISE second child — I didn’t think I’d be able to have another one and had started to despair).

    *big hugs*

  123. Laura responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 4:21 pm #

    Oh my goodness, congratulations, Kate! When you vaguely mentioned that you hadn’t been feeling great for a while, I was hoping that it was your first trimester (and, of course, hoping you’d feel better soon regardless). I’m so happy for you. From all I’ve read of your blog, you and Bear will be wonderful parents.

    The web can be a very cruel place to write about motherhood (or even read about it), but I hope you’re able to avoid, as much as possible, harsh judgment from readers and commenters and the urge to hold yourself impossible standards.

  124. Lucy responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 4:45 pm #

    Hi Kate,

    I was on vacation and just saw this! I am so happy for you and I hope it all goes well! Congratulations!!! :D

  125. shelley responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 6:31 pm #

    congratulations… you are going to be an awesome mom

  126. Gabs responded on 30 Jan 2013 at 8:11 pm #


    See, I put “ma” in the middle there, ’cause that’s what you are now. :)

  127. Jiminy responded on 31 Jan 2013 at 3:21 am #

    While walking to the tram this morning around 6.30, I found that my not-yet awake brain was thinking the following: `What a shame that I don’t have any picture of me eating cake while being pregnant, it would make a nice gift for Kate’s blog today. I wonder if she’s going to ask readers for belly/cake pictures at all.’ After coffee, I was simply amused that you were among the first people I thought of this morning, so I thought I’d send the warm buzz your way :) .

  128. Helen responded on 31 Jan 2013 at 9:55 am #

    First of all, congrats to both you and Bear! And secondly, may flights of angels trumpet you and your little one’s arrivals with plates of sweetmeats for talking about pregnancy in such a mature way.

    I have several chronic health conditions that mean I have suffered from daily nausea and extreme fatigue for 20 years. My life is a perpetual first trimester, except that actually carrying a kid could kill me. I find many pregnant women utterly unbearable when they experience fatigue or nausea or lack of independence for the first time.

    They come to me looking for sympathy but ready to reject my expertise because I’m not a mother and illness isn’t valued like pregnancy is in society. No one’s ever given me a seat on the bus or thrown me a party for coping with constant retching, barfing in public or being so tired I could cry. They have told me I don’t understand because ‘you’re not a mom’, accused me of being a liar, a faker, a shirker, a scrounger and excluded me from every conversation.

    This is the first time I’ve ever heard someone struck by pregnancy illness put it in context and I apologise for the moan, but it’s just so comforting to have had the chance. And so I’ll share my tips: sip ice cold water, eat more salt (check with the doc for pre eclampsia advice), avoid ginger (it doesn’t work and it’ll ruin it for life when you get the association), don’t go between extremes of temperature such as air con and heating when the nausea is active, don’t bend over directly, but twist to the side and eat some thing with protein before sleep like a small yoghurt or babybel cheese as it seems to help ease the nausea slightly while making first thing vomiting less stomach scouring. Avoid anything that increases bile production and get yourself some coconut water to help hydrate. Regular water does not cut it, you need potassium and carbohydrate or you just dilute your salts further. Oh and imagine vomming over the people you dislike. It’s massively carthartic and distracting. Good luck!

  129. Sara responded on 31 Jan 2013 at 3:40 pm #

    Wow, congratulations! I can’t wait for all the stories you will tell! Best of luck with everything, and I hope the nausea eases off a bit!

  130. Melinda responded on 31 Jan 2013 at 8:50 pm #

    I’m so happy for you, Kate! And you look so beautiful and blissfully content…this is wonderful news.

    I’ve been pregnant four times, but all of them ended in miscarriage. There is nothing I want more in the world than to be a mother someday.

    Unfortunately, my husband doesn’t want children, adopted or biological. So I guess I have a bittersweet feeling when I see other women expecting babies or walking with their little ones.

    Congrats again! Bear must be so excited! ;)

  131. JessB responded on 02 Feb 2013 at 5:20 am #

    Oh, I just saw this and I’m so happy for you and Bear, Kate! Congratulations on your pregnancy and wishing you all the best for the rest of your time carrying your baby and then welcoming then into the world.

  132. Alicia Cumming responded on 04 Feb 2013 at 9:29 pm #

    congrats!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i hope the preg. goes well from here on out, and wish all the emotional, financial, and physical health ever on you three! -alicia

  133. bethany responded on 04 Feb 2013 at 10:40 pm #

    congratulations! i saw the piece on thought catalogue as well and almostttttt sent you a message. what a lovely surprise! you will be the best parents :)

  134. Aussie Elle responded on 07 Feb 2013 at 8:48 pm #

    Congratulations all the way from Australia, Kate!!! This is such fantastic news and you are absolutely, glowing and gorgeous :)

    p.s Also couldn’t be happier to see your pieces popping up in Daily Life!! You save me from boring work days regularly!

  135. Eat the Damn Cake » women’s work responded on 21 Feb 2013 at 10:13 am #

    [...] left a comment on my first pregnancy post that went “Oh good, now you’ll never have to get a job. [...]

  136. Rachel Hindle responded on 21 Feb 2013 at 12:52 pm #

    i will never be a mom and am ok with that for this life’s incarnation anyways – i can feel the excitement in your words – congrats and life’s blessings :)

  137. Rachel responded on 07 Mar 2013 at 1:02 pm #

    We are the same age and due at almost the same time (I’m July 26). I am looking forward to reading more of your experience :)

    Also, congratulations – I know just how you feel!

  138. M responded on 28 Mar 2013 at 3:23 pm #

    Congrats! I am very behind on this news, because I too found out I was pregnant and proceeded to vomit for the next 3 months, which really got in the way of blog reading lol. But seriously, congrats. I reacted much the same as you did. My husband and I started trying right before our wedding last year. Neither of us were ever 100% about parenthood, but something about spending our lives together made us imagine a kid would be there too. So we tried. And tried. And tried. And even though it was only 8months of trying I felt like a failure and was convinced I couldn’t get pregnant. I made him buy me a puppy. A consolation baby. Funny enough, the night we brought that damn dog home I conceived. I started
    Getting really sick and missed a period. The dr. Did 2 separate blood tests, both came out negative. He said there was no chance I was pregnant. 3 weeks later I took a home test. I fully expected a negative, but I needed the reassurance. I felt like I was crazy and had some terrible food aggrevated disease. Holy shit, when the stick had two lines I nearly passed out. I called my husband over and showed him. He smiled and was cool like it was no big deal. I was freakig the f*** out. Even though this is what we wanted, what we planned, suddenly the idea of being responsible for something growing inside me was strange and terrifying. I just reached 2nd trimester and while still terrified, I am no longer sick and depressed and can honestly say I’m excited to meet him/her. I love reading all your posts. So many of the fears and anxieties are the same. Means a lot to know I’m not alone!

  139. Eat the Damn Cake » 26 and already pregnant responded on 04 Jun 2013 at 8:53 am #

    [...] But my body was. Two hours after that therapy session, I peed on a stick, telling myself that I was stupid for even taking a test this soon. It said “YES” in very straightforward digital letters. I was already pregnant. [...]